[Manager] replied 'per my last email' to their own email. Power move. Terrifying. I've told no one until now.

They removed the monitors to 'encourage hot-desking'. I hot-desk from the floor now. Very agile of me.

Day three of the offsite about improving remote collaboration. The wifi does not work. The trust falls do.

HR says we're a family here. My family does not make me badge in to prove I love them.

Filed a burnout complaint. HR responded with a resilience webinar. At 7am. Attendance mandatory. Cameras on.

Laid off via a calendar invite titled 'Sync'. No agenda, no context. For once, the invite was accurate.

My Slack goes away when I start working and active when I go to sleep. The dashboards have never looked better.

We spent 45 minutes deciding what to call the recurring meeting. It is called 'the weekly huddle'. We meet daily.

My badge stopped working before the meeting ended. The meeting was about transparency.

My feedback was 'be more visible'. I sit next to the printer. Everyone sees me. I am the most seen person in this building.

I nod in meetings while my camera is off. I am also asleep. These facts are related and load-bearing.

My boss booked a 1:1 titled 'quick chat re: attitude'. My attitude is that I have read the calendar invite and drawn conclusions.

The peer-feedback window closed before anyone submitted. My review is now vibes. The vibes are 'meets most'.

My status has said 'in a meeting' for two years. I water my plants. They are thriving. We do not discuss it.

Got told to 'think outside the box' on a task that is literally typing a number into a box in a spreadsheet.

Free bagel Thursdays. That's it. That's the entire retention strategy. The bagels are from Wednesday.

We held a moment of silence for the departed colleagues in the all-hands. The next slide was executive bonuses. Nobody had rehearsed the transition.

Calibration is where your rating goes to be negotiated by people who have never met you. Mine came back with someone else's name crossed out.